We can all agree to the fact that saying ‘No’ can be difficult but what is more challenging is saying ‘No’ to your own child. Your child can use multiple techniques to get their way but as a parent, it is our responsibility to stand to our ground. Understanding that saying no will help the child, in the long run, is the first step towards healthy parenting. As a child, we used to hate hearing ‘No’ from our parents, but when roles change and you become a parent you try not to let your child go through the same phase you went through. But when you begin to use this magic word ‘No’ you will start to realize how helpful these NOs are.
Saying no to your child is a form of setting limits. While parents try to fulfill most of their child’s wishes, there has to be a limit to everything, sometimes a child needs to understand the concept of money and the fact that it is not infinite, even when affordability is not a factor there need to be boundaries to the demands of a child.
It does not matter if your child is 3 or 13 they need to understand parents are their well-wishers and they would never say no without a reason. It is important to use ‘No’ only when it’s needed. Another important thing is we need to ignore the attention around a child’s misbehavior which increases the unwanted behavior. The more we try to pacify the child during the misbehavior, the less likely they will listen to correct themselves. Be firm and let them know your disappointment and ignore as long as there is no threat of injury to the child.
Becoming your child’s best friend is every parent’s dream (Read also We are being Watched)but that does not necessarily mean you have to cave into every demand your kid makes. Agreeing to everything your child wants will set them up with unrealistic expectations for the future. Survival in the real world is not easy and the child will have to learn it the hard way when they are out of their parent’s protection.
We can say as parents it is our responsibility to make our kids ready to face the world, saying ‘No’ can be a guiding tool to turn your naive child into a healthy adult. Go ahead, try saying ‘No’ for a change.
Varsha Srivastava: HR Professional